Trigger warning: insecurity.
Silly, stupid girl.
You’ve made him up in your mind.
Imagining that he wished,
wanted,
desired,
conspired,
to have You.
How many times
do your heart and eyes have to bleed
before realizing that he doesn’t see you?
He sees through you,
he sees you belonging to someone else.
He sees through you,
he sees you as a place to lay his things.
Everything, but nothing.
His bag and his burdens are yours.
You silly, stupid girl,
he sees through you.
We say “stay a while”
when someone won’t remove their coat.
But what do you say
when the words are stuck,
and you can’t say: “I could love you
better than you’ve ever been,
better than you ever will be.”
I wish I could tell you,
I wish you could see.
I wish a thousand wishes
that you’d wish
for a moment with me.
A moment so sweet,
so pure and so new.
I wish
that you’d wish
for a moment of truth.
It’s ok though.
It’s fine.
Nothing will change.
Nothing can change.
Because you’ve got somebody now,
and so do I.
I’ll be silly.
I’ll be stupid.
As long as one day I can hear you say:
“I could love you too.
Better than you’ve ever been,
better than you ever will be.”
Gayle Geeter is a mom from Memphis curating joyful experiences for her family through food, fun, and love. When she’s not brunching with her friends or planning a cute date night with her husband of 10 years, she’s building community professionally and personally for youth in Davidson County.