i miss the big picture looking for
something deeper.
past what is shown lies anxiety alone.
between the lines were the lies my mind told
about me ending up alone.
when i’ve fallen from the golden throne,
overthrown,
free to be a woman of my very own.
but the price to pay i owe to this day.
passed onto the next it is relayed,
each juncture i reach is delayed,
as the debt is never fully paid.
if i’m not the savior, i’m a traitor.
is that not the gift my family
prayed for?
surely i’d rather be grateful
than eventually
grow hateful
but such is the cost, which cannot be cheaper
to be the people’s dirty laundry keeper.
Kailani is an amateur writer. She writes for the love of writing. It is her sincerest form of expression—a way to put her wide-ranging ideas and life experiences into something cohesive. As a clinical therapist, she helps others find, listen to, and use their voice. And her writing is her voice. The world as she experiences it is her inspiration, and her love of personal flair fuels her style. She doesn’t think she’s to write the next great American novel, but she’s to write something. Stay curious.
Featured image by Mike L.
